How do you see trust?

Trust in the workplace is a lot like oxygen. You don’t notice it until it’s gone. And then that’s all you notice. One of the challenges of trust is that people understand it with different metaphors. Some people see it as a blank slate. They are willing to extend trust to others unconditionally. Trust is…

Resilient groups end triangulation

Triangulation happens when you have an issue with someone, but instead of talking directly with that person, you talk about the person and situation with a third person.  This behavior undermines group trust and cohesion in two ways: You lose the opportunity to improve the relationship. You don’t talk about the issue, work through it,…

The origins of drama

By David Emerald Have you ever wondered why your conflict has so much drama? We learn and develop strategies to get what we want as children. As infants and toddlers we are little beings looking up at giant and powerful adults.  We all used our innate survival instincts to secure food, sleep, warmth, love and…

How do you say “I’m sorry”?

When was the last time you had to apologize for something you said or did? We human beings create lots of opportunities to practice apologies—not because we’re evil and intend to hurt people (though sometimes that may be true); but more often  because we are fallible, and despite our best intentions, we react to failing…

The value of conflict

Have you ever found yourself thinking “If they would just listen to me, we could finally make some progress!” You begin to judge others as difficult, maybe even incompetent. You feel self-righteous, misunderstood, unappreciated, frustrated, or worse, ignored. Your motive shifts from wanting to solve the problem, to wanting to prove you are right, and…